We just got done eating a wonderful meal - basically completely from our garden. Tomatoes, onion, garlic and shrimp in a wine reduction sauce. It was great. But, after dinner, DH wanted me to "blog" about this delicious dinner. And I am really fighting this notion.
I use an RSS feed reader to keep up to date with my blogs. The only trouble is I have literally hundreds of blogs that I subscribe to. What that means is every day that the author posts to their blogs, my reader picks it up. Of those hundreds of blogs I subscribed to, I only religiously read a few. And they're not all food blogs, by any means. Waiterrant is one of my favorites. As is Everything is Wrong With Me by Jason Mulgrew. Not to mention Opinionista. Or Damn Interesting. Or Go Fug Youself. What I'm trying to say is that there is not enough hours in the day to read everything of interest. Kinda like "Better Homes and Gardens" magazine.
I used to subscribe to "Better Homes and Gardens" magazine and it used to drive me crazy. Those beautiful pictures of the perfect garden; or the perfect kitchen; or the perfect meal. And then (as if that wasn't enough) I started subscribing to Martha Stewart Living. What a beautiful magazine. What scrumptious recipes! Where BHG left off, MSL picked up. It was meant to inspire me to greater achievements. What is did was make me depressed about the way I lived.
Don't get me wrong, I don't live in a hovel by any means. But, I just couldn't - didn't want to - make my home into the showcase that these magazines endorsed. True, with MSL their intent was to inspire you to be more that you thought you could be. But, who has the time! I work full time, am a grandma (full time) and try to keep my house in a semi-semblance of order. Kinda like every other woman I know.
It occurred to me the other day that my blog list is getting kinda like my Better Homes and Gardens. It had grown to monster dimensions. Something that I could no longer keep up with. And I felt guilty about that. Here are all these wonderful people writing these wonderful things on their blogs, and I didn't have the time to read them. Not only were they better cooks/gardeners/craftsmen/writers/photographers than I, but I wasn't soaking up their words of wisdom! What an ungrateful wench.
So, what did I do... I deleted every highlighted entry so I wouldn't feel so guilty about not reading them. I was caught in the BHG trap. Nothing I had or could do was as good as what I was reading.
And then that started me feeling really guilty about my own blog. Instead of this being a place where I could just let my hair down and speak my mind without the worry of social censorship, I started to try and write things I thought the other bloggers might find interesting.
Well, FUCK THAT. I'm not that interesting. I'm just me. I'm not a haute cuisine chef. I'm not a pastry meister. Whereas I might like a "light" supper, that always entails meat of some kind. To just eat a salad for supper... well, that just ain't gonna happen. I made Farmgirl Fares summer in a bowl tonite and it was fantastic. But I paired it with shrimp. And if it wasn't shrimp, it would be steak. I don't care how hot it is, I want my fucking MEAT.
Ok, forgive me (you un-named masses). I just needed to get that off my chest. I wish I could bake like Ivonne of Creampuffs in Venice. Or garden like Kate of Farmgirl Fare. Or keep my house like Flylady. Or plan my meals like Leann Ely (see Flylady). Sorry. It ain't gonna happen. I'm 55 years old. I love my husband, my daughter and my grandson. That's it. The summer rain will fall. The weeds will grow. The grass needs mowed. And another person is calling from jail and wants his bond reduced. Take a number honey 'cause it aint gonna happen today.